Movie Review: Ninja Assassin (2009)
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Aubrey Ward III
I'm just a regular guy that loves watching movies and talking about them. I feel it's my duty as a world citizen to detect cinematic "bombs" so you don't have to. I'm no cinemaristocrat but if I think a film is worth spending money on I'll tell ya. If it's not fit to be used as a doorstop I will certainly tell ya. And remember to always rent first before buying.
By Aubrey Ward III
Published on 11/27/2009
Hey, Did Someone Order A Bloody Martial Arts Flick With Red Swordplay, Extra Throwing Stars and Pepperoni?
Ninjas Vs Rush Hour Traffic. No, Really. It’s In There.
Ninja Assassin.
I know. When I first heard the title I though about video games and those cheesy multiplex titles characters in a film go to see. Some of the immediate images are guys scurrying around in black pajamas performing impossible feats of agility and using all sorts of weapons that are created for two purposes: getting your car door open if you locked the keys inside again or mutilating a person to a bloody mess.
Ninja Assassin has lots of guys running around in black pajamas. Their weapons rend their targets into bloody shreds. They are magnificent fighters with incredible speed, dexterity and stamina. And, yes, at times Ninja Assassin can feel like the offspring of video games like Ninja Gaiden or Tenchu. But cheesy? No. I wouldn’t call Ninja Assassin cheesy. Especially since I like my head attached to my neck.
Great Balls Of Fire! Yeah, see, look......balls....on fire. I don't make this stuff up, folks.
This might surprise a whole lot of people but Ninja Assassin actually has (are you sitting down?) a plot. I, too, was shocked to discover that this was not just a martial arts demonstration film. There are good reasons why these ninjas are wreaking havoc in Berlin. Not New York City. Not Los Angeles. Not even Tokyo. The present day story takes place in Berlin, Germany while the flashbacks take place somewhere in Japan (or I’m assuming the clan headquarters is in Japan).
The Ozunu Clan has been in operation for a very, very long time. Think of it as a “School For Gifted Killers”. Lord Ozunu (Sho Kosugi) has orphans brought in from all over the place to train in the ninja arts. The children are taught hand-to-hand combat, strength training, stealth, healing spells and more as they grow into warriors worthy of Lord Ozunu’s army. The punishment for failure is being whipped, put in a box or worse so the incentive to succeed is pretty high. Raizo (Rain) is Lord Ozunu’s prize pupil but one day he turns against the clan and now he has to run from his former brothers and sisters (yeah, the House of Ozunu is an equal opportunity assassin school).
Mika Coretti (Naomie Harris) is a forensics researcher (aka glorified librarian) for Europol. On her off time Mika follows intel about mysterious murders being carried out by mysterious beings. She tries to convince her boss, Ryan Maslow (Ben Miles), that the culprits are ninjas but Ryan scoffs at the ridiculous notion of real life ninjas running around slicing up people. It isn’t long before Mika hits paydirt and that alerts the Ozunu Clan to shut her down for good. Luckily, Mika has a guardian ninja angel on her side but can just two mortals stand against the might of the Ozunu Clan?
Probably not but it’ll be really thrilling to watch them try.
The first major offering from Ninja Assassin is lots of action. The fight sequences are heavily stylized so expect some really cool looking scenes like a rooftop free-for-all in the pouring rain, a sword sparring match amidst flaming lanterns, and ninjas fighting through traffic. This flick will certainly get your adrenaline pumping.
"They're Heeeere.....ahem......The ninjas are heeeere." - Mika (Naomie Harris)
I was curious why Dark Castle Entertainment was involved. They usually specialize in horror movies so why would they be attached to an action film? Because if you want good looking gore you want to go to those that do it best. The kung fu shenanigans are married to severed limbs and lots of blood. Granted that most of the blood you’ll see spurting out of those severed arms and necks is CG (computer generated) but it still adds vibrant punctuation points to all those amazing stunts.
The screenplay was overseen by Matthew Sand and J. Michael Straczynski but I’m tempted to give a little more credit to Straczynski for making sure the story of Ninja Assassin wasn’t completely drowned out by the outrageous stuntwork. Raizo’s story is actually compelling. Thanks to the well-crafted flashback scenes I was given a greater sense of how Raizo became such a skilled warrior and, of course, why he would leave a world he seemed destined to rule.
The chemistry between Raizo and Mika is delightful. I was relieved that Raizo wasn’t the usual ice block warrior who has no humor or charisma whatsoever. There’s a really cheeky exchange when Raizo has to buy new clothes for the targeted Mika and she lies about her size. He goes along with it and when Mika tries on her too tight jeans Raizo delivers the punchline and it’s really magical. I’m still on the fence on whether or not these two should’ve hooked up romantically. I know it’s clichéd but they always manage to pull off love scenes in the movies starring Jean Claude Van Damme or Arnold Schwarzenegger. Even when those guys were on the run they still managed to make time for nookie somehow. On the other hand, the fast pace of Ninja Assassin didn’t allow for much romance anyway. By the time Mika would get her top off, AHH! Ninja in the corner! Maybe if there’s a “Ninja Assassin 2” they can team up on a case in the Bahamas?
Rain is hot. Rain is smoking hot. He delivers the intensity physically and emotionally. I am hoping that the DVD / Blu Ray release will have extensive behind the scenes footage of the stunt preparations. It looked like Rain put in a lot of himself to make the action as realistic and authentic as possible and I really appreciate that. I looked on his Wiki file and discovered that Rain is South Korean not Japanese. I wanted to cry a small foul but then I remembered that the Ozunu students are brought in from all over the world so it wouldn’t be unlikely to have Korean, Chinese, and many other races represented in the clan.
On the flipside, I was disappointed at the lack of Rick Yune who plays Raizo’s Ozunu brother / rival, “Takeshi”. It just would’ve been nice to see more of him in the film. I really liked him in Die Another Day. Oh well.
"When I Told Ya To Yank My Chain It Was a Figure Of Speech. Sheesh." - Raizo (Rain)
Naomie Harris is a personal favorite mostly because of her great performance in 28 Days Later. The first thing that threw me about her portrayal of “Mika” was her American accent. The second shock was her relaxed hair. With all this recent talk about women of color and their “nappy” hair I kind of miss the natural hairdo that Ms. Harris had in 28 Days Later. My personal nitpicks aside I think Ms. Harris did a superb job. She goes from being the damsel to being an agent to be reckoned with. She must be something special to survive a ninja clan attack for so long even when Raizo isn’t available.
I guess I would be committing a felony if I didn’t shower praise on “Lord Ozunu” himself, Sho Kosugi, who has starred in a bunch of actioners like Enter The Ninja and Ninja III: The Domination. The dojo master is always cool especially if he’s a naughty dojo master and Mr. Kosugi succeeded in chilling my blood. Don’t you just love those villains who slit your throat but wipe off the blade immediately after because they don’t want to get blood on your recently polished wood floor? Lord Ozunu is one of those gentlemanly baddies that offer you tea before having you drowned in boiling oil.
Oh yes, and Randall Duk Kim makes a memorable appearance as a Yakuza tattoo artist that has a special history with the Ozunu Clan. Mr. Duk Kim was recently seen in Dragonball: Evolution and played roles in major hits like The Matrix Reloaded and Memoirs Of A Geisha. Is Ninja Assassin worth the ticket price? I think so. If you’re an action fan you’ve already seen it or you’re seeing it before the weekend is out. Personally, I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised by the amount of dramatic content in the movie. I’m not saying it’s the stuff of Best Picture nominations but it’s about two rungs above those disposable karate movies from the 80s and 90s.
Bah, who am I kidding? If you wanna see elaborate and blood splattered fight scenes on the big screen then go see Ninja Assassin. If you have been itching for some more of the same slick swordfighting brawls that made you giddy like the ones that made Kill Bill a cult classic then go see Ninja Assassin. If you’re looking for a film that harkens back to an age of innovation with pathos and wonderment……then I think Amelia is still playing in Theater# 5.
I know. When I first heard the title I though about video games and those cheesy multiplex titles characters in a film go to see. Some of the immediate images are guys scurrying around in black pajamas performing impossible feats of agility and using all sorts of weapons that are created for two purposes: getting your car door open if you locked the keys inside again or mutilating a person to a bloody mess.
Ninja Assassin has lots of guys running around in black pajamas. Their weapons rend their targets into bloody shreds. They are magnificent fighters with incredible speed, dexterity and stamina. And, yes, at times Ninja Assassin can feel like the offspring of video games like Ninja Gaiden or Tenchu. But cheesy? No. I wouldn’t call Ninja Assassin cheesy. Especially since I like my head attached to my neck.
Great Balls Of Fire! Yeah, see, look......balls....on fire. I don't make this stuff up, folks.
This might surprise a whole lot of people but Ninja Assassin actually has (are you sitting down?) a plot. I, too, was shocked to discover that this was not just a martial arts demonstration film. There are good reasons why these ninjas are wreaking havoc in Berlin. Not New York City. Not Los Angeles. Not even Tokyo. The present day story takes place in Berlin, Germany while the flashbacks take place somewhere in Japan (or I’m assuming the clan headquarters is in Japan).
The Ozunu Clan has been in operation for a very, very long time. Think of it as a “School For Gifted Killers”. Lord Ozunu (Sho Kosugi) has orphans brought in from all over the place to train in the ninja arts. The children are taught hand-to-hand combat, strength training, stealth, healing spells and more as they grow into warriors worthy of Lord Ozunu’s army. The punishment for failure is being whipped, put in a box or worse so the incentive to succeed is pretty high. Raizo (Rain) is Lord Ozunu’s prize pupil but one day he turns against the clan and now he has to run from his former brothers and sisters (yeah, the House of Ozunu is an equal opportunity assassin school).
Mika Coretti (Naomie Harris) is a forensics researcher (aka glorified librarian) for Europol. On her off time Mika follows intel about mysterious murders being carried out by mysterious beings. She tries to convince her boss, Ryan Maslow (Ben Miles), that the culprits are ninjas but Ryan scoffs at the ridiculous notion of real life ninjas running around slicing up people. It isn’t long before Mika hits paydirt and that alerts the Ozunu Clan to shut her down for good. Luckily, Mika has a guardian ninja angel on her side but can just two mortals stand against the might of the Ozunu Clan?
Probably not but it’ll be really thrilling to watch them try.
The first major offering from Ninja Assassin is lots of action. The fight sequences are heavily stylized so expect some really cool looking scenes like a rooftop free-for-all in the pouring rain, a sword sparring match amidst flaming lanterns, and ninjas fighting through traffic. This flick will certainly get your adrenaline pumping.
"They're Heeeere.....ahem......The ninjas are heeeere." - Mika (Naomie Harris)
I was curious why Dark Castle Entertainment was involved. They usually specialize in horror movies so why would they be attached to an action film? Because if you want good looking gore you want to go to those that do it best. The kung fu shenanigans are married to severed limbs and lots of blood. Granted that most of the blood you’ll see spurting out of those severed arms and necks is CG (computer generated) but it still adds vibrant punctuation points to all those amazing stunts.
The screenplay was overseen by Matthew Sand and J. Michael Straczynski but I’m tempted to give a little more credit to Straczynski for making sure the story of Ninja Assassin wasn’t completely drowned out by the outrageous stuntwork. Raizo’s story is actually compelling. Thanks to the well-crafted flashback scenes I was given a greater sense of how Raizo became such a skilled warrior and, of course, why he would leave a world he seemed destined to rule.
The chemistry between Raizo and Mika is delightful. I was relieved that Raizo wasn’t the usual ice block warrior who has no humor or charisma whatsoever. There’s a really cheeky exchange when Raizo has to buy new clothes for the targeted Mika and she lies about her size. He goes along with it and when Mika tries on her too tight jeans Raizo delivers the punchline and it’s really magical. I’m still on the fence on whether or not these two should’ve hooked up romantically. I know it’s clichéd but they always manage to pull off love scenes in the movies starring Jean Claude Van Damme or Arnold Schwarzenegger. Even when those guys were on the run they still managed to make time for nookie somehow. On the other hand, the fast pace of Ninja Assassin didn’t allow for much romance anyway. By the time Mika would get her top off, AHH! Ninja in the corner! Maybe if there’s a “Ninja Assassin 2” they can team up on a case in the Bahamas?
Rain is hot. Rain is smoking hot. He delivers the intensity physically and emotionally. I am hoping that the DVD / Blu Ray release will have extensive behind the scenes footage of the stunt preparations. It looked like Rain put in a lot of himself to make the action as realistic and authentic as possible and I really appreciate that. I looked on his Wiki file and discovered that Rain is South Korean not Japanese. I wanted to cry a small foul but then I remembered that the Ozunu students are brought in from all over the world so it wouldn’t be unlikely to have Korean, Chinese, and many other races represented in the clan.
On the flipside, I was disappointed at the lack of Rick Yune who plays Raizo’s Ozunu brother / rival, “Takeshi”. It just would’ve been nice to see more of him in the film. I really liked him in Die Another Day. Oh well.
"When I Told Ya To Yank My Chain It Was a Figure Of Speech. Sheesh." - Raizo (Rain)
Naomie Harris is a personal favorite mostly because of her great performance in 28 Days Later. The first thing that threw me about her portrayal of “Mika” was her American accent. The second shock was her relaxed hair. With all this recent talk about women of color and their “nappy” hair I kind of miss the natural hairdo that Ms. Harris had in 28 Days Later. My personal nitpicks aside I think Ms. Harris did a superb job. She goes from being the damsel to being an agent to be reckoned with. She must be something special to survive a ninja clan attack for so long even when Raizo isn’t available.
I guess I would be committing a felony if I didn’t shower praise on “Lord Ozunu” himself, Sho Kosugi, who has starred in a bunch of actioners like Enter The Ninja and Ninja III: The Domination. The dojo master is always cool especially if he’s a naughty dojo master and Mr. Kosugi succeeded in chilling my blood. Don’t you just love those villains who slit your throat but wipe off the blade immediately after because they don’t want to get blood on your recently polished wood floor? Lord Ozunu is one of those gentlemanly baddies that offer you tea before having you drowned in boiling oil.
Oh yes, and Randall Duk Kim makes a memorable appearance as a Yakuza tattoo artist that has a special history with the Ozunu Clan. Mr. Duk Kim was recently seen in Dragonball: Evolution and played roles in major hits like The Matrix Reloaded and Memoirs Of A Geisha. Is Ninja Assassin worth the ticket price? I think so. If you’re an action fan you’ve already seen it or you’re seeing it before the weekend is out. Personally, I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised by the amount of dramatic content in the movie. I’m not saying it’s the stuff of Best Picture nominations but it’s about two rungs above those disposable karate movies from the 80s and 90s.
Bah, who am I kidding? If you wanna see elaborate and blood splattered fight scenes on the big screen then go see Ninja Assassin. If you have been itching for some more of the same slick swordfighting brawls that made you giddy like the ones that made Kill Bill a cult classic then go see Ninja Assassin. If you’re looking for a film that harkens back to an age of innovation with pathos and wonderment……then I think Amelia is still playing in Theater# 5.