Sorry I took so long to roll this one out. Been a busy week. The Cloverfield monster ate my PC and then I was stuck in Freddy Krueger’s boiler room because someone slipped me a major dose of rufees (PS – If Freddy offers you coffee don’t drink it. He hasn’t changed that pot since The Dream Warriors). I woke up in a van down by the river and had to hitchhike my way back home with a very frisky, dragon breath trucker named Road Rambling Roger. Anyway, here’s my review of Whip It.


The Hurl Scouts. Their cookies bite you back: Maggie Mayhem (Kristen Wiig), Smashly Simpson (Drew Barrymore), Bloody Holly (Zoe Bell), Rosa Sparks (Eve), Razor (Andrew Wilson) and Bliss aka Babe Ruthless (Ellen Page)

Bliss (Ellen Page) is a troubled teenager living in the ho-hum town of Bodine, Texas. The highlights of Bliss’ existence is attending her drab high school, serving “Squealers” at the local diner, and grudgingly participating in local beauty pageants. One fine day Bliss spies a flier advertising a roller derby event in Austin, Texas. She and her pal, Pash (Alia Shawkat), attend the event and Bliss is inspired to try out for the team known as “The Hurl Scouts”. She practices her skating skills, lies about being over 21 and makes the team.

What was once an uneventful life is made luminous by this awe-inspiring religion called roller derby. Bliss makes friends (and a few enemies) with the toughest yet hottest chicks in Texas, she finds a rocker boyfriend (Landon Pigg), and becomes a roller star in her own right thanks to her incredible speed on the track.

But how long can Bliss keep this secret life from her parents and how long before her new pastime costs her some things she held dear in her old life?

Whip It, based on the novel “Derby Girl” by Shauna Cross, is my kind of movie. I love stories about the misfit that finds his/her place in the world. Usually it’s with a larger group of misfits like monster squads, goonies, or mutants. In this case, the main character goes for roller derby. She gets a team, a name, and a specific role on the team. More importantly, roller derby is something the girl chose. It wasn’t her mother and it wasn’t her peers. Roller derby is what Bliss desired and she went with it and found her happiness in it. I like that. I like watching characters find their niche in the world and it’s especially satisfying when the character discovers this special place on their own.


Piggin' Out: Pash (Alia Shawkat) & Bliss (Ellen Page)

Drew Barrymore’s directorial debut is a smash, in my book. I guess that’s pretty fitting since Barrymore’s character is nicknamed “Smashly Simpson”. Remember that kind of “rockin’ your air guitar in your favorite t-shirt to your favorite rock jam” feeling that Charlie’s Angels had? That’s what Whip It has. It’s smothered and then baked in “cool”. This is so not a Nora Ephron movie. Leave the tissues at home…..on second thought, bring the tissues. You might end up spewing your cola drink out of your nose during some scenes of hilarity. The story eventually takes a turn for drama when the stuff hits the fan but it works and it doesn’t bring the momentum to a grinding halt.

Bliss is cool and all and Pash is fun, too, but the derby ladies are where the sparkle is. The featured team is The Hurl Scouts. Maggie Mayhem (Kristen Wiig) is the sensible “Mother Hen” type that takes Bliss under her wing. Rosa Sparks (Eve) is just as smooth off the track as she is off of it. Smashly Simpson (Drew Barrymore) loves to brawl and Bloody Holly (Zoe Bell) adds a bit of zest to the team.

The Hurl Scouts are led by their coach, Razor (Andrew Wilson). Armed with a whistle and a playbook Razor works with his team to get them ready for combat. Or at least he tries really hard to do that. It’s a miracle if even one of his players pays him more than two seconds of attention.

Then you got the notable members from rival teams like Iron Maven (Juliette Lewis) of The Holy Rollers who has a major grudge against the Hurl Scouts’ rising young star. Eva Destruction (Ari Graynor) of The Black Widows also makes a little mischief for Bliss.


Staring Down The Competition: Iron Maven (Juliette Lewis) vs Babe Ruthless (Ellen Page)

Marcia Gay Harden plays Bliss’ mother. I don’t know why Ms. Harden takes on these pious and snooty characters but she does them so well. Bliss’ dad is played by newcomer, Daniel Stern……ha ha ha, just kiddin’. Dad is pretty cool but Mom is extremely uptight, especially in the “rear region”. It’s because of Mom that Bliss competes in those dreaded pageants. The viewer can only hope that Mom thaws out before Bliss runs away from home permanently.

I was happy to see Alia Shawkat. After sharing the smaller screen with Michael Cera on Arrested Development I was a little baffled that she didn’t find the same notoriety that Mr. Cera did. I hope Whip It will bring more good scripts Shawkat’s way. She’s so funny and I love her freckles. What a beautiful contrast to all those smooth faced actresses on the screen.


When I said I wanted to get laid this isn't what I had in mind, Bliss: Oliver (Landon Pigg) & Bliss (Ellen Page)

Whip It is predominantly a fun movie. The dialogue is on the wit level of a Diablo Cody or Joss Whedon work. The humor is smarter than your average teen flick but that’s mostly because this is a movie crafted with female sensibilities. That means a lot less reliance on profanity and toilet humor. A good majority of the characters are totally fascinating. Whip It is just a trip and a half. I enjoyed it immensely, I’ll probably pick up the DVD to pass around to all my friends that decided to see Fame a second time instead of Whip It in the theater and it might even get me to start watching roller derby games on ESPN or whatever.

Good job, Ms. Barrymore. Please keep on bringing the good stuff to the big screen. And what’s up with "Charlie’s Angels 3"? I want another one. Surely Ms. Liu and Ms. Diaz are up for a third go-round. Until then, I’ll be happy to Whip It good (oh, c'mon, you knew I was gonna fit that in somewhere eventually).