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Review -- Valentine: Act Naturally
- By Martha White
- Published 10/21/2008
- Television
-
Rating:
Martha White
I love television, am an insomniac, and own three dual toner TiVos. TiVo saved my marriage. In a choice between keeping my television shows and dumping my ESPN obsessed husband, I would have gone with TV shows. TiVo lets me have my cake and eat it while watching a ridiculous amount of television.
View all articles by Martha White
This week’s episode proves that even egomaniacal, socially irresponsible, unlikable little biatches deserve love from nice guys.
The Soulmates
Tucker – a theater actor who is channeling the overworked smarmy charm of Topher Grace
Vivi – a sloppy replica of Lindsay Lohan/Britney Spears
If only they could share an unstaged kiss! Then and only then, the Fates decree, will they be happy.
The Problem
When you first meet Vivi, she drunk drives up to the theater so she can have front row parking for a club and drunkenly crashes into poor Tucker’s theater when escaping from the paparazzi.
So I guess the biggest problem is that I hate her.
Conveniently, though, this irresponsible behavior puts Vivi in the market for lawyers.
The Plan
1. Pose as lawyers
2. Voodoo the judge into giving Vivi 100 hours of community service at Tucker’s theater so they’ll be forced into close proximity
3.
Wait for Tucker lose his mind and decide he loves this useless bag o’trash because she once played a decent Amelia Earhart which totally bombed and therefore justifies all her crappy behavior
4. Intervene “via Wifi” when miscommunication sends Vivi to the airport and out of Tucker’s life so she dramatically runs back to him and they live happily ever after
The Internal Drama
Phoebe had a vision of Grace/Aphrodite lying in a pool of her own blood linked somehow to romance novelist Kate. Phoebe and Leo decide to dig further by breaking into Kate’s apartment to steal a personal item to offer to the Oracle for another vision of the future.
Unfortunately, they set fire to her apartment which conveniently means she has to live at the house. Phoebe’s suspicions of Kate grow when she discover’s the authors stash of mythology books.
The Cliffhanger
Someone blonde is messing with the Oracle pool. But who? Or is it whom? I don’t know. Kate is a definite suspect but what motivation would she have?
The Outlook
So far, the show’s record is 3 nice, decent clueless guys and 3 dysfunctional chicks. Let’s try to flip those stats, shall we?
The Soulmates
Tucker – a theater actor who is channeling the overworked smarmy charm of Topher Grace
Vivi – a sloppy replica of Lindsay Lohan/Britney Spears
If only they could share an unstaged kiss! Then and only then, the Fates decree, will they be happy.
The Problem
When you first meet Vivi, she drunk drives up to the theater so she can have front row parking for a club and drunkenly crashes into poor Tucker’s theater when escaping from the paparazzi.
So I guess the biggest problem is that I hate her.
Conveniently, though, this irresponsible behavior puts Vivi in the market for lawyers.
The Plan
1. Pose as lawyers
2. Voodoo the judge into giving Vivi 100 hours of community service at Tucker’s theater so they’ll be forced into close proximity
3.
4. Intervene “via Wifi” when miscommunication sends Vivi to the airport and out of Tucker’s life so she dramatically runs back to him and they live happily ever after
The Internal Drama
Phoebe had a vision of Grace/Aphrodite lying in a pool of her own blood linked somehow to romance novelist Kate. Phoebe and Leo decide to dig further by breaking into Kate’s apartment to steal a personal item to offer to the Oracle for another vision of the future.
Unfortunately, they set fire to her apartment which conveniently means she has to live at the house. Phoebe’s suspicions of Kate grow when she discover’s the authors stash of mythology books.
The Cliffhanger
Someone blonde is messing with the Oracle pool. But who? Or is it whom? I don’t know. Kate is a definite suspect but what motivation would she have?
The Outlook
So far, the show’s record is 3 nice, decent clueless guys and 3 dysfunctional chicks. Let’s try to flip those stats, shall we?
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Comments
Comment #1 (Posted by havocthecat)
Rating:
I was considering giving this show a try, because I fangirl Greek and Roman mythology in massive ways. Do you like the god-types? The guest characters seem a little meh.
Comment #2 (Posted by Martha White)
Rating:
I can fangirl anything! I do like the god-types although they tend to fare better in books than in shows but I really really really want Valentine to do well. The soulmates are definitely the weakest link on the show, but I'd be fine if the writers concentrated on developing a really interesting mythology. I think this means occasionally breaking away from the current formula. Can anyone think of decent pantheon-centric shows from the past?
(also, i hate to keep rating my own articles as excellent - but firefox forces me to rate them otherwise I would abstain!)