The Best Part of '300' Was Making Fun Of It
My hopes for this movie were not very high; I mean, any movie that has blood as part of the logo is probably not going to be an Oscar contender. However, it's by director Zack Snyder whose remake of "Dawn of the Dead" was fun, and it's based on a decent graphic novel by Frank Miller. I figured it would, at least, be tolerable.
I should also mention that I attended with my boyfriend Scott, who's a wonderfully enthusiastic geek, and our mutual friend Lanny, who, besides being a great geek in his own right, also tends to agree with me on which leading men are hot. *grin*
300 turned out to be a bit of a disappointment, however. It's no 'Dawn of the Dead.'
The best part of this movie -- and Lanny and I agreed on this -- were the hot guys. If you like muscular half-naked men wearing loincloths and capes, the movie has them by the scores. Plus a few partially naked and very improbably perky women. My boyfriend probably appreciated the women more than Lanny and I did ... so I guess it's fair to say this movie does have something in it for everyone!
Other than the *ahem* human scenery, however, '300' really doesn't have much going for it.
Lanny observed that the plot was narrower than the pass at Thermopylae. It really is limited and very basic -- the plot is good guys fighting an impossible battle, but determined to take out as many of the Persian army as they can. Yep, that's about it. There was a minor sub plot with the queen and a nasty politician which contributed nothing to the story. If you're looking for plot rather than artistic hack-and-slash you won't find it here!
The characters were flat, one-dimensional, and had absolutely no development over the course of the movie.
They didn't learn anything -- they didn't evolve, or change, or have any real flaws or weaknesses to make them human. They just were presented as stereotypes -- the brave king, the father who loses his son and the son who dies (and who I knew was a red-shirt from the moment he appeared) the literally monstrous bad guys, the loyal queen, the cute kid. Etcetera. I didn't identify with any of them. There was very little internal conflict, as well. The good guys were cookie-cutter heroes, self-sacrificing and unquestioningly brave.
On the other hand, they were all pretty people, except for the monstrous bad guys -- who were truly and artistically nasty, in a "Boss Villain" video game sense. The handsome Spartans were quite yummy and are worth mentioning again. Nummmmmy!
The fight scenes were decently choreographed, if that's your cup of tea -- though they randomly employed a weird slow-motion effect. I would say that the computer animation overall was excellent -- while they didn't completely lose the "sound stage" feel this is a well-choreographed and artistic movie. If you like great fight scenes, you'll probably like "300."
Overall, '300' was not an unbearably horrible movie. It's bad, but it's bad with style -- it's the sort of awful movie that you can watch without getting bored, and then later rip apart with great glee. Which we did do, enthusiastically, the moment the credits started rolling. (And the credits got a few chuckles ... "Wait for it ... wait for it ... wait for it ... SPLAT!" -- and blood spatters the screen, repeatedly.)
Recommendations: This is the perfect movie to see with a pack of other geeks -- the laughter potential in making fun of it over dinner afterwards will make the price of admission worthwhile. However, it is a gore fest, and anyone offended by seeing boobs on the screen or historical inaccuracy might want to skip it.
I should also mention that I attended with my boyfriend Scott, who's a wonderfully enthusiastic geek, and our mutual friend Lanny, who, besides being a great geek in his own right, also tends to agree with me on which leading men are hot. *grin*
300 turned out to be a bit of a disappointment, however. It's no 'Dawn of the Dead.'
The best part of this movie -- and Lanny and I agreed on this -- were the hot guys. If you like muscular half-naked men wearing loincloths and capes, the movie has them by the scores. Plus a few partially naked and very improbably perky women. My boyfriend probably appreciated the women more than Lanny and I did ... so I guess it's fair to say this movie does have something in it for everyone!
Other than the *ahem* human scenery, however, '300' really doesn't have much going for it.
Lanny observed that the plot was narrower than the pass at Thermopylae. It really is limited and very basic -- the plot is good guys fighting an impossible battle, but determined to take out as many of the Persian army as they can. Yep, that's about it. There was a minor sub plot with the queen and a nasty politician which contributed nothing to the story. If you're looking for plot rather than artistic hack-and-slash you won't find it here!
The characters were flat, one-dimensional, and had absolutely no development over the course of the movie.
On the other hand, they were all pretty people, except for the monstrous bad guys -- who were truly and artistically nasty, in a "Boss Villain" video game sense. The handsome Spartans were quite yummy and are worth mentioning again. Nummmmmy!
The fight scenes were decently choreographed, if that's your cup of tea -- though they randomly employed a weird slow-motion effect. I would say that the computer animation overall was excellent -- while they didn't completely lose the "sound stage" feel this is a well-choreographed and artistic movie. If you like great fight scenes, you'll probably like "300."
Overall, '300' was not an unbearably horrible movie. It's bad, but it's bad with style -- it's the sort of awful movie that you can watch without getting bored, and then later rip apart with great glee. Which we did do, enthusiastically, the moment the credits started rolling. (And the credits got a few chuckles ... "Wait for it ... wait for it ... wait for it ... SPLAT!" -- and blood spatters the screen, repeatedly.)
Recommendations: This is the perfect movie to see with a pack of other geeks -- the laughter potential in making fun of it over dinner afterwards will make the price of admission worthwhile. However, it is a gore fest, and anyone offended by seeing boobs on the screen or historical inaccuracy might want to skip it.
Spread The Word
Related Articles
- Graphic Novel/Manga Review--In Odd We Trust
- Review - "Fred Claus"
- Faces Familiar, Faces Fresh, Faces Fiennes
- Spoilers all around for the Whoniverse
- If You Liked '300' Just Wait for '301'
- Daily Fanfic Rec: The Moon-Ruled (Card Captor Sakura)
- '300' Sacks Box Office
- Review -- Remember '300' Indeed
- 'Shazam!' to Bring Captain Marvel to the Big Screen
- Dark Horse at Wondercon 2007: 'Buffy' and 'Serenity' News
- 'Trek XI' Will Beam Into Theatres on Christmas Day 2008
- "Dark Knight" Casting: Aaron Eckhart to Play Two-Face
- "Deathly Hallows" Breaks Records
- "Evil Dead" Will See Its Dying Day February 17th
Comments
Comment #1 (Posted by stefan duncan)
Rating:
I can hardly believe you described the same movie and to be so uneffected and not get it. The movie is a masterpiece in graphics and its storyline and characters they bestow honor. The wife gives herself for her husband, the King wants to say he loves his wife but can't and he is tempted with treasures beyond belief, the warrior is devastated for losing his son, the orgre betrays the Greeks because he was basically asked to be a waterboy. And... you that is unmoved by this movie wait and see the numbers rolling in by the public that do get it. The most important part of this movie is that it shows what real honor was and what you do to stand for freedom. Even in defeat there is glory.
Comment #2 (Posted by Carole Douglas)
Rating:
L. Ms snds s f sh jst bt hs th ntllgnc f ms!
Comment #3 (Posted by Mary)
Rating:
I have to wonder if she saw the same movie I did because I loved it!! The other people in the theater did also and they were both old and young in age and as many women as men. No accounting for some people's taste.
Comment #4 (Posted by Val)
Rating:
Hw bt tkng jrnlsm clss frst. Yr wtng s hrrble s s yr rvw.
Comment #5 (Posted by Kim)
Rating:
Y'r cmplt dt! r y lkng fr smn t cmmnt tht y'r cl r smthng. Wll, y'r nt gng t gt t frm m. I cnsidr yr pnn dlscnt nd nclld fr.
Comment #6 (Posted by Cygnet)
Rating:
Just as a note, reasonable comments -- including disagreement with this review -- will be approved. If you want to disagree with it by all means do so. Tell us why you liked this movie or debate some of the points (such as no character development or limited plot) that L. Mouse makes.
Personal attacks on the reviewer, as per site policy, are simply rude and will be disemvowelled. There is room in fandom for differing viewpoints and everybody's opinion deserves respect.
Additionally, please note that comments posted this week are eligible for our drawing for some prizes. See the link in the header above for more details. This includes disagreeing viewpoints -- as long as they're not personal attacks.
Comment #7 (Posted by MM)
Rating:
Thanks for the review! I was already not planning on wasting my time or money, but it's nice to find that decision confirmed by someone whose opinion I trust. (Is this the Lanny I know from waybackwhen or someone else?)
Comment #8 (Posted by L. Mouse)
Rating:
Thanks, MM. And yes, almost certainly the same Lanny given our shared circles of friends. He's fun. :-)
Comment #9 (Posted by Scott The Boyfriend)
Rating:
Now I did watch the same movie as Mouse and Lanny, I sat in between them. Being a fan of mythology in general, especially Greek, I was expecting a lot from this film, and to say the least, it fell sorely short of them.
I was hoping for a plot and some story work to go with the action and fighting (which in and of itself WAS beautifully done), but this simply never materialized. I must agree with mouse that there was no character development nor did I really give much of a damn about any of the characters within it - this is just me, but I tend to enjoy a movie much more when a bond forms between the characters on the screen and the viewers...that's part of the magic that sucks you into the story.
300 was nothing more than a two+ hour fight scene, which gave me no real satisfaction. Mind you, the fight scenes were very well-done, but that alone could not save this movie from getting a bad review in my mind. Go see this film with a bunch of friends and have fun ripping it apart, because that will be more entertaining than the time you lose in the movie theater.
Incidentally, I -will- give 300 kudos for having the most violent ending credits I've seen in nearly 15 years.
-Scott The Boyfriend-
Comment #10 (Posted by Lanny)
Rating:
Some of my comments regarding the movie:
1. Story. There is none. Persians come to attack, Spartans go off to war to fight them. End of story.
2. Character development. I challenge anyone to point out ANY character development in the movie. Circumstances force characters to make decisions, but that is not character development. If you want good character and story development in a similarly themed movie, watch Gladiator.
3. Setting. Some of it is quite impressive, though other reviews of it leaving the viewer with a "video-game" feeling is accurate. A little goes a long way and I don't believe CGI should be the star of the show, no matter how beautiful it is. And the CGI "wolf" at the beginning of the movie was a clear indication to me about just how bad the movie was going to be. But hey, at least the video game will be cool, right?
4. Hyper-violence. This is probably a good depiction of just how bloody and horrific a war can be. However, the 'video-game' feel of the movie served to distance me emotionally from the violence, rather than make it 'up close and personal'. Without an anchor into the movie that character development or story development provides, I don't feel the same emotions as the characters do.
5. Beefcake. Well, there's one good point to the movie. Even in death, the Spartans still managed to look like they were having a pornographic moment.
6. Historical accuracy. Very little, from what I'm told. I mean, who marches around with an army of a million men, anyway? Does anyone care about the logistics associated with trying to keep that many people alive? An example: the U.S. has 20K+ people in Iraq. How much money and logistics do you think goes into the care and feeding of our military? Now multiply that by about 200. Why not 50, you ask? Because for every "x" number of people, you need someone to be in charge, and more helpers -- the overhead costs and burden. Management 101.
7. Acting. Some good moments, some good one-liners, and I had wondered where Stephen McHattie (one of the politicians) had disappeared to. For those who don't know, he was the villian in the final season of Beauty and the Beast, after Linda Hamilton left the series. Oh, and during the scene where Leonidas is shouting "THIS. IS. SPARTAAAA!!!", I had a flashback to Captain Picard from Star Trek screaming "THERE. ARE. FOUR. LIGHTS!!!" Yup, that's about how bad it was.
I'll probably get it when it comes out on DVD because it's cheaper than buying porn.
-Lanny.
Comment #11 (Posted by Anna)
Rating:
I think that you missed entire point of the movie.
Comment #12 (Posted by L. Mouse)
Rating:
Oh, I got the point. I'm actually quite a history buff and I knew this story before "300" was ever even a graphic novel. It's a great story of heroes sacrificing their lives to save their people. Good stuff.
I just didn't think that "300" did a very good job of telling the tale.
Comment #13 (Posted by Kristin)
Rating:
I liked 300 and yet I agree with Mouse's views. Whether you think its good or bad, it's the perfect film for an outing with your own Mystery Science Theater gang.
Comment #14 (Posted by Dennis Maki)
Rating:
Gt lf Ms. Y rlly nd t gt t f yr hl n th wll mr ftn. Hstrcl ccrcy sd, ths mv ws VRY ntrtnng fr nyn wh nrmlly gs t bd ftr 7:00 pm. t's bvs y nd t thnk bt crr chng?
Comment #15 (Posted by jen)
Rating:
mmmmmmm spartans.
yummy yummy spartans.
one thing I know for sure, I didnt really care if the thing was acurate, if there were character developments, or if the backgrounds were over done - I enjoyed the yummy spartans and the first thing I wanted to do when my husband and I left the theater was go home and pretend he was leaving for battle ;)
I actually really enjoyed the "painting" feel of the movie as I love the art in this film. I guess being an artist myself, I really appreciated all of the work that must have gone into this movie as far as creating the backgrounds and how hard it is to try to picture yourself in a scene while standing in front of a blue screen and trying to act accordingly.
mmmmm yummy spartans.
;)
Comment #16 (Posted by mIKIE)
Rating:
L Mouse has the correct name to ID her [his} personality; touchy feely with little appreciation for the time honored virtues of love, honor, and commitment. The drama was about sacraficing yourself for the benefit of others. It is a movie after all, and one is foolhardy to expect historical accuracy and political correctness. Facing head on an unbeatable enemy for the sake of those you love, knowing death is inevitable, but also that glory and honor live on Ahhh-wooh!!!
Mike